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Wednesday, September 23, 2009

I had an interview earlier. It was great; I could possibly be employed by next week. Another company email me; probably want to set another interview. The same position though. Hopefully it will work out. I 'm really not in the mood to celebrate though. To think it was a day I thought I have accomplish so much just to be overshadowed.

I made the mistake of giving her the wrong SIM card. Now, there is no way for anyone to contact me. One of the company tried to call me but I don't have a mobile phone line. She blames me for giving her the wrong SIM card. You know what, it was my fault. I trusted her to not be foolish enough to trust people so easily and had my line cut off continuously. It is my fault that I use her name to get a phone line. It was my fault that I expected too much for a responsible older sibling. I am tired, tired of having to be frustrated and hoping that one day every single bad memory of her will disappear. I cried for the first time in my life out of frustration. Frustration of hoping and expecting for someone to change. Honestly, I am done with hoping. It will never happen. Not now, not ever. From now on, whatever is thrown at me, I will just stand on my ground and take it as it is. After that, I will pick up the pieces of what damage done to me and move on. When someone slaps you across the face one too many time, it gets numb. That is how I feel right now.

Numb

When I stop expecting, I stop getting hurt.

Till then,

11:48 PM

Saturday, September 12, 2009

Heylo... I know I know it has been ages since I last blog. I have ended school (Good riddance!) which makes me ponder for awhile. I mean the blog was created to reflect my daily struggle in school so now when school ends, what will ever happen to this blog?

Well...

This blog will eventually crease to exist upon receiving my diploma. Yes, it is sad to let go of something that you have spent years in perfecting. We have our ups and downs and fond memories along the way. Let's recap what happen since I first step in school till this very day.

  • Academics

Honestly, I m not the brightest bulb in the socket but hey! I made it through didn't I? This just proves that no matter what your pace is, everyone will reach the finishing line. I remember looking around the lecture theatre and going totally awe. New friends were the only friends we had then. You'd cling onto them for your dear life. We get lost together, eat lunch together and waited for each other to come late for a class. Eventually, everyone starts forming clicks. The exam was hard but the supplementary papers were harder.

  • New found friends

Maths were uber hard but if I hadn't flunk it, I wouldn't have found the most awesomest ( I m starting to pick up Chris's English habits) friends ever! It was the first maths lesson. I forgot my glasses for that day so I had to squint for most of the time. I met Tasha first, she was like next to me and we exchange empty conversation that was before she pounces on me and ask me for my number ahahaha! Not literally of course but it was very blunt! I haven't said anything about it... till now kehkehkeh. Sabrina was in the same class. She thought I was giving her the stink eye but in the matter of fact, I was trying to figure out if she was either Chinese or Malay. I met shahidah waayyy later. I wasn't too fond of her at first but shahidah has the type of personality that kinda grows on you. Hehe after etiquette lesson for 3 years with the girls, shahidah is now a cultured lady with good table manner... on most part. At least now she doesn't look like she is trying to kill a cake. It is drastic improvement really. So many friends come and go but you guys stick it out with me entirely. I m not much of a mushy person but I LOVE YOU GUYS! And you guys are my besties V_V...There I said it... :P


 

  • Chris

We met like a year ago and you taught me so much. You are my best friend and you mean the world to me. We d talk about school and discuss bout the different subject we studied the day earlier. Its different now I guess, since I m no longer in school. I hope your feelings don't change cause mine won't. J

I guess I covered a whole lot of grounds today. But I will be back! This blog will fall to crease the day after graduation. Will I blog? Hmm... I m not sure really.We shall wait and see ;)

12:35 AM

Wednesday, August 12, 2009

A day at school,

Me: Zul, nanti nak gi blaja?
(Zul, u wanna go study later?)

Zul: Erm tak kesah.
(Sure no problem.)

Me: Mat(Referring to Ahmad), kau nak gi blaja nari?
(Mat, you wanna go study today?)

Ahmad: Nari? Okay uh bole
(Today? Sure no problem)

30 min later,

Ahmad: Liyana, aku rasa nari aku tak jadi blaja uh. Aku cam nak demam.
(Liyana, I don’t think I can make it today. I m coming down with a fever)

Me: pfftt fine! Aku blaja dengan Zul aje
‘’ ‘’ (I ll study with Zul then)

Zul: I don’t think I can make it today. Nak abiskan project. Dateline besok.
‘’ ‘’ ‘’ ‘’ ‘’ ‘’ ‘’ '' '' '' ( I have to complete my project. Dateline is tomorrow)

Me: Ah yelah korang dua-dua tak boleh means aku kena belajar sorang la nie?
(Pfft… Since you both can’t make it today, I have to go study alone right?)

Thanks a lot. -___-

12:00 AM

Tuesday, August 11, 2009

Hello. Sorry for going M.I.A for the most part. Anyways, the interview wasn't all that bad. But I still hate my Ccom teacher. Have you ever been in a situation where you unknowingly battered the teachers ego. I felt like I did that just because the interview went well and he went the extra mile to make me speechless. It was going well, I research on what I have to do, get dress right for the occasion and did all the necessary rehearsal before the interview. Since it was going uber great, he throws in a curve ball. Start talking to me like as if I was really interested in the mock interview job. Honestly, I find the job scope interesting but without any knowledge in arts, I d probably suck balls. So he cornered me and got me speechless and he had this smirk on his face. Only God know how much I feel like slapping him and giving him the finger before walking out of that room. It was so tempting, but I restrain myself. I was better than that. Heck, I was better than him. Apparently, I m not the only one that can't stand him. Plenty of those been in his firing range. So last week, we had a project assignment for Mobile Com, I ganged up with Azlina to get the job done. We had a bumpy start but it went fine along the way. Azlina had some serious panic issues. We had 1 minute left and she froze coz she made a tiny error

Azlina: OMG!! I wrote the equation wrong it suppose to be MHz!! I wrote KHz... omg omg omg!

Me: stop panicking! Just change it to MHz!!

Azlina: I can't! Omg omg omg!

She literally froze staring at the paper. It was funny and tense moment back there. So on the Friday, I met up with Krun and Firdaus just for alittle get together. We went on a food expedition! So for that day, we decided to investigate this new eatery call "Vintage deli cafe". So I met sick Krun at Bugis while firdaus went to pray at Sultan Mosque, we waited for him outside when he was carrying a packet of food and said it was free. And yes, I gave him the wtf stare. So anyways, this restaurant is like very cosy. It has only been running for the past 3 months. The foods are mostly western and Italian. The service is superb and the people there are warm and friendly. Not the kind of service you would expect from vendors at Sultan Mosque area. So if you happen to be around there do drop by their little restaurant. The food price range is not that expensive but it can be quite a pinch if you are looking for an eatery that serve your typical everyday hawker food.

Exam is like around the corner but I m like a huge procrastinator.. Pfftt.. insyaAllah I will start eventually. Pray hard for me babes! Till then, Tabby outz!

Blog soon!

1:00 AM

Sunday, August 02, 2009

Its Sunday and I m studying.. wohoo! Major improvement! Since it is the start of a wonderful week, i got $400 to spare for the next month. I honestly need to have a better finance system. Since the past couple of weeks, I've tried to live of $5 a day and it was working well got a few couple of dollars in saving till my old habit kicks in.

It was a beeaaauutiful Thursday afternoon. Went to the student admission building to collect my metric card. So when I left the place, I thought to myself " heeyy why don't I just hit the library since I have hours to spare" since it is a requirement for us to take our temperature before heading into the library, I went to the temperature taking station nearest to the library....

Business school....

So there I was, walking and getting my temperature taken when I walk pass a pushcart. Plenty of people there and I thought what the heck, I was looking around for nice bargains when I saw a box of eyelashes. Since my interview is this Friday I thought it would be nice to have big bright looking eyes. I went to the girl and we talked. Before I realise what I have done, I have actually forked out $12 for 10 PAIRS OF LASHES! I walked to the library a little daze and when I came to my senses,

I HAD 10 FAKE LASHES!!

All I needed was a pair and I ended up with 10.

Sheesh.

So to make it worst, the next day, I was suppose to meet Tasha earlier for lunch but somehow she didn't wake up and decide to cancel on me pfftttt!!! Since it was GPS Foxhunt Friday, I wasn't exactly dress for the occasion. So I was looking around for a tracksuit or something. Went to metro but nothing was much to my liking or appropriate for the beach. So I headed to John Little. Some of the stuff are available at metro at the same price. Talk about redundant, Tasha, tell your mom to ask her company to stock up on stuff other store don't have or at least make it cheaper than the other competitors. Anyways, as I was browsing through, had nothing in particular really, I saw some uber cute maxi dress sadly, the bust area are too small... pfft... so I went back to put the stuff on the shelves which I rarely do and came upon this uber cute empire cut dress and I was like hmmmm I should try this and guess what...

IT FITS!!

Not to mention it was appropriate for a day at the beach. Took the dress off and look at the price trying to brace myself from the pain that would surge in my all so empty pockets and it cost....

$8.00!!

I was like what the freak! 8 dollars for a dress that fits me?! I went out of the fitting room smiling from ear to ear and of course I got another one of the dress in different colour and pattern. Hehehe... It was dirt cheap! I ll post the picture of the dress soon. Chris been asking for me to take a picture in it and I was like "sure.." I will post it but I m not sure when I m gonna wear it again. It's too cute to be worn too often.

See Tasha, you could have gotten to see me in that uber cute dress if you weren't too lazy to wake up from bed.

And today, of course, I went to Jusco to get more clothes however, this is for the interview! Hehehe Jusco was having a sale so. Why not take this opportunity to get nice office attire for Friday. Got some good bargains on a button down blouse which actually cost RM59.90 for RM17.10. Hate to admit it but I am a sucker for sale stuff. Spend like RM 100 for an entire outfit for Friday. Modest Yana for interview lolz!

So I still have like $50 more to spend on covered shoes and makeup. I think it is more than enough actually. Knowing me and my forte in rummaging bargain bin like a big ol racoon in a dumpster.

Well till then :D Blog soon!

10:56 PM

Friday, July 24, 2009

Am I angry and frustrated? Very much so. You see, I am an avid volunteer and I do it because I enjoy it very much. But for some people, becoming a volunteer is a mere attempt to get as much attention on oneself or simply just because there is a glimpse of finding a nice future husband. And honestly I regret to ever invite "HER" (You guys should know who I am talking about.) to be part of the volunteer organisation family. Regret it for the rest of my life. You see, no wonder how bad her character and her real personality is, my father will never see anything wrong with her. It's like she is flawless and misunderstood. Other than the contributing factor of having the teachers call home and having numerous number of people catching her in the act, she is free to do whatever she likes with nothing but a slap on the wrist. As for me, everything is just shoved down my throat. No question asked, do it or die. I get punish for something I didn't do.

Honestly is that fair?

Some may quote "Life is never fair". Sure life is never fair, that's why idiots are put in high ranking offices. Words can't really explain how disappointed I feel right now. I really don't see the point of stating the obvious. Let's see the evidence shall we?

HER

ME

  • Fucked up at school
  • Caught by numerous people yet still denies it
  • Lie to hang out with friends
  • Screw siblings over just so that she have friends to hang out with.
  • Wasted hundred over dollars in tuition just to flunk
  • Working butt off at school
  • Sacrifice time to work for family.
  • Hardly go out with friends
  • Stay up late just to do assignment when coming home late everyday
  • Never once said no to whatever my parents demands were.


I know that I am not perfect. I struggle with school on a regular basis. I m not saying that I am a genius whenever it comes academically but what sets me apart from her is that I work hard to get where I am right now. Even if I don't make it, I know that I didn't go down without a fierce fight.

Why am I suddenly bringing up about it? Let me tell you what happen just earlier. I came home, tired as usual. So I ask my dad (politely) if I can go for the Volunteer Induction on Sunday. And he raised his voice at me and said no. Reason being that I have to concentrate for my exam when I told him that I was going to get my study done on Saturday. So she can go gallivanting with her friends at KL and fuck up at school and I can't even go do something out of good will. I guess to him, I need to be whip to shape. Whereas she get to go around and paint the town red. I am honestly tired. I wish I have the guts to rebel. But I don't. Call me a coward for respecting my parents, I don't really care. I hope one day my dad will realise that I m not her. I m getting choked up just to blog about it.

I ll blog soon.

10:04 PM

Tuesday, July 21, 2009

Hello there! I keep losing my hair band for some reason. It was on my hair earlier and poof! Its missing now. Dammit! So anyways, yesterday, went to granny’s place and cousin start talking bout this new rumor that have been speculating around about an old lady selling fish crackers and that she bring along a banshee with her.

Yes, you read it right, a banshee.

For those who are not so advance or powderful in your English, banshee means a dead woman who died a tragic death and her soul is out to scare the crap of random strangers cause she is bored with her everyday routine which is to float around aimlessly. So anyway’s this makcik(mature lady) sells fish crackers and if you refuse to buy it, she will send a banshee to your place. Firstly, why does she need to send a banshee?

If her keropok is good, I m sure there are lazy ass malay family that will buy it in an instance, especially when there is fried rice around ( fuck! I m salivating). And to make it more suspiciously lame, the sms sender will ask you to have a broomstick and used rusty nail. I m sure the banshee will fear getting hit over the head with a broomstick or threaten to poke her with a rusty nail causing her to fall over and die from gangrene in an instance. So make sure! Once u find a rusty nail, hang a picture on it!!! So it will no longer be unused. Don’t wanna scare the banshee with a rusty unused nail, just because she’s dead, doesn’t mean she is uneducated!

So anyways, for me, I m not sure if the story is true of not. If it’s true, then you all are doomed for hell!! (I stay in johor, the banshee doesn’t have a passport hehehe..). I assume the makcik is a good marketing strategist, cause she makes profit whether you like it or not. Or maybe she is really a good lady trying to make an honest living but some envious lady decide to pour sand in her rice bowl and spread lies about her.

Does this apply to muffin sellers as well? (Tasha’s fav muffin)

Seriously people, don’t get over immensely hype out about it, how trustworthy are there sources? I m not saying that I don’t believe in the other realm which is beyond what our naked eyes can see but scaring yourself at wits end over news of the poor lady selling keropok. Maybe it’s a conspiracy plot so that you people will stop talking bout MJ death. I don’t know really, I m just speculating on that one. Maybe I should start making rumors and hopefully one day my cookies will be hot in demand too.

*shines torchlight under chin*

I heard, there was an attractive 20 year old who sell cookies in Johor, she came across the makcik selling keropok and they went on an all out war. It was crazy, everything was in slow motion, the banshee tries to strangle her, but she was quick enough to shove a cookie in her(banshee) mouth, rendering the banshee into a state of daze and blown up from the delicious-ness of the girl’s cookie. The old lady sprint of her dear life and swore to attack Singapore with her clone banshee that she have deep fried at home. In order to get rid of the evil banshee, the girl's cookie is your only salvation. She is The One.

Realistic enough? Ahahah maybe that will boost my cookie sale. So anyways, enough typing for now. Oh before I leave, I have to address something that I find really annoying. The school should employ me as a customer service at their engine hall 1 cause apparently out of so many people here, they tend to enquire stuff from me, do I have a “Information Desk” note stuck at the back of my head or something? And apparently out of so many computer here, they prefer to ask to use mine whenever they can’t log on. My problem is it? If you can’t long on means you are stupid and u should quit poly. Enough of the angry post.

Blog soon ya!

12:02 PM


Miss Vainity!